Sometimes life feels needlessly stressful, difficult, frustrating, you name it. We take a step forward, then get knocked a few steps back. But one sure-fire way not to let life hold us back for long periods of time is to strengthen our resilience. Setting our minds to bouncing back from the things that knocked us down (once we’ve taken the time to feel and process our feelings as needed) can redirect our energy in a positive way. Here’s your guide to stepping into your most resilient self!
1- Let yourself sit in the discomfort, sadness, frustration, etc.
Without allowing yourself to feel your feelings, you might “bounce back” in the short term, but what else will inevitably bounce back up are those feelings you tried to suppress. To heal in the long term, let yourself process it all. It might not be fun or pretty, but your future self will be grateful you did.
2- See every situation you’re going through as temporary.
While, yes, certain circumstances are permanent, chances are, the severity of your feelings surrounding the circumstances isn’t. The harder the time, the harder this may be to believe, but it’s seldom untrue. Think back to a similar time when you thought you’d never get through something, but you did. You made it to the other side stronger, wiser, and more well-equipped to handle future challenges. Trust that the same will be true this time around. Resilience knows that there’s something worth fighting for on the other side of a difficult time. So, to embody resilience, look ahead to what’s beyond this time, because there absolutely is a “beyond”!
3- Let each experience you go through demystify itself for you.
To bounce back from a hard time, it helps to know that you can experience it and survive. For instance, your first breakup, as difficult as it may be to get through, is a chance to show yourself you can. Once upon a time, the prospect of a breakup may’ve been a scary, faraway thought that you didn’t even want to imagine. Now that it’s become your reality, at least in this fleeting season of life, isn’t it a little less frightening? It’s surely far from fun or ideal, and it may hurt for a while, but over time, it will hurt less. Dating new people (when the time comes) won’t present the same level of dread surrounding that potential outcome. You’ve been there, done that, and you’ve survived long enough to keep putting yourself out there with new prospects!
4- Make it your goal to push through, first and foremost for yourself.
Think of your younger self who needed a role model to admire. Think of your future self who will be so proud of you and happy to have made it to the other side. Of course, think of your current self who wants to move forward. Lastly, think of any other people or things who/that motivate you to keep going. When you direct your focus toward a bigger purpose, you’ll find that it’s much easier to continue on. What a difference a strong “why” makes!
5- Channel your energy into constructive action-taking.
Resilience comes not from overthinking situations but from redirecting your energy into moves that will help you progress. It’s much easier to bounce back when you’re regularly taking steps to do so. You’re no longer in your head; you’re in control of the actions you take to improve the circumstances, or at least your mindset around them! That’s something to be so proud of and grateful for!
The bottom line…
Since some situations are simpler to bounce back from than others, adjust your expectations and approach for each one accordingly. It’s okay if certain things take longer to get through than ideal. Think of these tips as reference points for when you’re ready to start moving forward. You’ve got this!
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