As human beings, we’re constantly faced with decisions to make, both big and small. Even if you consider yourself a fairly decisive person, there will inevitably come times when making a decision feels like the most daunting task in the world. In these cases, it’s probably the countless variables to consider, plus the potential consequences of deciding “wrongly”, that create self-doubt. My post Monthly Mindset Shift: Combatting Self-Doubt About Past Decisions discusses how self-trust can help with this. Here, though, we’re tackling the dilemma from another angle.
A deeper dive into the reasoning behind our self-doubt about our decisions…
Even after making a decision, we often struggle with wondering whether or not we chose wisely. There’s a truth that we tend to overlook, though… Making the right decision doesn’t mean that there are no arguments in favor of the wrong decision. You could make one of the best decisions of your life and still overanalyze it enough to find arguments against it. Concluding that something is the right decision for you should be enough; case closed. Yet we’re tempted into the abyss of second-guessing ourselves, just because not all possible roads lead us to our right decision (in other words, arguments can still be made in favor of the alternate decision).
What we temporarily forget is that we’re capable of making informed decisions. If you’ve done the necessary soul-searching to lead you in the right direction, take peace in knowing you did all you could.
This concept in action…
Say that you just left a job that you’ve been at for a few years for a new job. The reasons you left the former job are as follows:
•Your former boss wasn’t giving you opportunities for advancement or even entertaining the idea when you brought it up. Alternatively, your new boss offered you a higher position than your former one.
•Your former salary was substantially lower than your new salary.
•There was a hostile work environment at your former job. It was tough to get along with any of your coworkers.
•Your former job wasn’t conveniently located, whereas your new job is only 5 minutes away from where you live.
These reasons sound pretty compelling as to why this job switch was the right decision. While you felt good about leaving for these reasons, there were a couple reasons why you previously considered staying at your former job. Despite generally preferring your new job, these counterarguments linger in your mind every once in a while. They are as follows:
•Your new job is much more technology-focused, and you’ve never considered yourself to be tech-savvy.
•You have greater responsibility at your new job, which can sometimes feel intimidating.
Ultimately, when you made the decision to switch jobs, you did so with certain priorities in mind. Ex: your desires for advancement, a higher salary, convenience, and the potential for a better work environment. With advancement and a higher salary as two of these priorities, you may have made this decision already suspecting, if not knowing for certain, that this new job would challenge you and push you out of your comfort zone.
However, you made the decision anyway because you felt that the pros of leaving outweighed the cons. The cons may take some getting used to, as to be expected. Whenever you start to feel even slightly regretful about your decision, it’s worth reflecting on why you made it to begin with. Dive deep into the entire thought process that led you to make the decision that you did. Remind yourself that you did thoroughly consider the cons, but that the pros mattered to you more. Remind yourself of why they mattered to you more.
The bottom line…
You may know deep down that you made the right decision. (If you’re unsure, my post Is it the Right Decision? Ask Yourself This Question should give you some clarity on this). However, that doesn’t necessarily mean you won’t go through an adjustment period as a result of that decision, especially if it involved a big change (like switching jobs).
Dealing with the cons of your decision doesn’t make that decision any less right. It doesn’t take away from the larger pros. It simply means that the decision wasn’t free of cons. At the end of the day, what decision isn’t? It’s just a matter of choosing what factors hold more value to you. If your decision is anything like the example above, I’d say you chose correctly!